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Cranky Dog

House Procrastius
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About Cranky Dog

  • Rank
    Neither cranky, nor a dog
  • Birthday 08/25/1971

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  • Gender
    Male
  • Location
    Six hours north of Ottawa

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  1. Cranky Dog

    Getting to Know You, June 2018

    World peace, free of hate and discrimination with lots of diversity! Basically, like the Star Trek Federation of Planets ideology (the reality depends on the episode). Alternatively, true love! She exists within the confines of my mind. Working in a male dominated industry, living in the middle of nowhere, and being a geek introvert, makes relationships... nearly non-existent. Bonus wish: A salty, crunchy, greasy, tasty snack that's actually healthy to eat in large quantities! I'll call it Cranky Crunch! Also comes in chocolate dipped flavor.
  2. Cranky Dog

    Randomness XIV: THE FLOOR IS LAVA!

    Sneaks in and gives a hug to Aryanun She-Who-Rightfully-Wields-The-*BONK!*
  3. I own the first edition of Mission : Red Planet! Agreed, it's a fun game, with simple rules, yet demanding quite a bit of forethought and strategy.
  4. Cranky Dog

    Getting to Know You, June 2018

    For building and fixing stuff: licensed mechanic, carpenter, welder. I want my sanctuary and death machines to be well built, and not just held with duct tape. Health: doctors and nurses. An everyone will get training in first aid. We'll have very limited access to medication, so anyone with chronic diseases is going to go through a rough time. Survival: Farmers, foragers, hunters, survivalists. Those who know how to get the most out of natural resources, and know how to make booze. Fitness: Personal trainers. Good cardio is essential! Catchall: Grandmothers, 'cause they've seen it all. They'll know how to handle this, like in the good ol' days. Catchall (plan B): Geeks. 'Cause we've seen it all. We *think* we know how to handle this. We'll be ignored. Catchall (plan C): Matt Damon (have you seen The Martian, it's awesome!) Spiritual: Cult leader. Those chronic disease people I just mentioned? They'll be sacrificed so that the evil may pass over us. For the greater good! Might as well throw in a geek or two for good measure, they're really getting on my nerves. Political: Trump (or Hillary Clinton; Justin Trudeau; Theresa May, etc.) [Insert political joke here] Mostly so we can blame someone.
  5. Cranky Dog

    Getting to Know You, June 2018

    I just remembered that T'Challa, aka Black Panther is a very good leader (the right of succession can get a bit extreme though). And I'm not saying that just because I want a pet battle-rhino. (I mean, I *do* want one, that and a force field cloak, but T'Challa is a desirable leader for other reasons).
  6. Cranky Dog

    Happy birthday, Froggy The Great!

    Happy Birthday @Froggy the Great! Make your day better by adding a ray gun mod!
  7. Cranky Dog

    1/30 Scale Dungeons and Dragons diorama

    This looks almost like what you'd see on the box of a play set. And I want one!
  8. Cranky Dog

    Getting to Know You, June 2018

    Favorite? Hmm, I'm coming up blank as most fictional rulers are either the bad guys, good guys who haven't had time to make a difference, or just unmentioned or inconsequential. I'd be a visionary, long term investments, well funded science and culture, free healthcare and education, openness to all cultures without going to SJW extremes (moderation is key), no standing army as I play nice with neighbors and don't make enemies. Obviously I'll be the (tragic) victim of a coup within a week. My ultimate goal is to get a nice monument and a sandwich named after me.
  9. Cranky Dog

    Randomness XIV: THE FLOOR IS LAVA!

    When Calvin & Hobbes was still being published in the papers, each time my parents read the strips (my dad had a fondness for the snowmen), they would ask themselves which of their three kids it reminded them. Unanimously, and without any hint of hesitation, the answer was ME! (and *not* my brother or sister). I'm also always amazed to be reminded that Bill Watterson was also a very talented illustrator.
  10. Cranky Dog

    Randomness XIV: THE FLOOR IS LAVA!

    Though I own the latest edition, and haven't seen the original box set rules in ages, I can only say that it doesn't really matter. Paranoia is one of those games where the setting and the troubleshooter's misadventures are more important than the actual rules. About the new edition, one thing it does take into account is that players are from the 21st century where the Internet, smartphones, and modern terrorism are known facts of life. So Alpha Complex has been tweaked so that instant access to knowledge (assuming you have clearance, which you probably don't, have a treason star for even trying) is possible. The threat of Secret Commie Mutants is more generalized to Secret Terrorist Mutants (though probably still a communist). Everyone has a Cerebral Coretech which is an intro-ocular heads-up display (troubleshooters get extra info not available to others) and direct monitoring system for the Computer. It's still a color coded dystopian future, AND WE ARE GRATEFUL TO FRIEND COMPUTER FOR SUCH A HAPPY SOCIETY TO LIVE IN.
  11. Cranky Dog

    Randomness XIV: THE FLOOR IS LAVA!

    Suddenly reminded that this is the sort of stuff you'd find in a game of Paranoia, and also from a beginning scene in an episode of Red Dwarf.
  12. Cranky Dog

    Getting to Know You, June 2018

    We forgot the most obvious answer: TWENTY! Twenty of what I leave to your imagination. So saying singing "I'm a lumberjack" is not OK? Could there be lumberjanes?
  13. Cranky Dog

    Randomness XIV: THE FLOOR IS LAVA!

    An unattended single red button. That is the cleverest most evil device possible to test temptation. Though in my case, I would first remove the screws, inspect the insides, take notes, reassemble the device, derive a conclusion... then repeatedly hit the button till all my hands and fingers ache to release all of that sweet pent-up dopamine. An existential scream may or may not accompany the final act.
  14. Cranky Dog

    Getting to Know You, June 2018

    Already answered: A woodchuck would chuck as much wood he could if a woodchuck could chuck wood. The real question is: How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could berserker rage like a barbarian?! The results would be far more interesting. Probably include the skulls of fallen enemies (like them stoopid beavers, thinking they're all high and mighty because they *can* chuck wood).
  15. I had kids age 5 playing Carcassone (recommended 8+), with a bit of grownup supervision. Recommended age is sometimes meaningless. It really depends on the individual children. Granted, I wouldn't try games like Twilight Imperium with children as it's a complex game even by adult standards.
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