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Dilvish the Deliverer

Getting to Know You, Mar 2018

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3 hours ago, ttuckerman said:

I had to sink to the bottom and jump off to come up.

There's even a name for that method.. 

 

 

 

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6 hours ago, Dilvish the Deliverer said:

Question the 19th of March: Can you swim?  If so, when did you learn?   Any funny stories involving swimming?

Yes.

When I was a kid.

Not particularly.

3 hours ago, redambrosia said:

That sounds creepy. What if a kraken got you :wacko:

 

2 hours ago, Dilvish the Deliverer said:

That's what the torpedoes are for....

 

Although during swim calls, we did have a guy stationed on the bridge as a shark watch with a rifle.  The running joke is that if he saw a shark he was supposed to shoot the guy furthest out to draw the shark so everyone else could get aboard safely.

I've been the guy with the rifle a few times.

I've also been in the open ocean a few times, but I stayed pretty close to the ship because we told that joke, too.

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7 hours ago, Dilvish the Deliverer said:

Question the 19th of March: Can you swim?  If so, when did you learn?   Any funny stories involving swimming?

 

Yes.

Not actually sure when I learned, exactly. I had swimming lessons, but they were traumatic (I had /no trust/ for the instructor. NONE), and I ended up picking it up on my own, later from what I remembered of the classes.

 

I'm not fast. But I will get there eventually. And I don't sink, which has caused issues (no. I can't do that thing where you use your arms to get to the bottom in one stroke, /it doesn't work/. I can, and have demonstrated floating upright without actually having to do anything .. ). *sigh* I'm not kidding... but try explaining that to a young guy who has seen everybody else do it.  

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6 hours ago, Dilvish the Deliverer said:

Question the 19th of March: Can you swim?  If so, when did you learn?   Any funny stories involving swimming?

 

Yes, my mom made sure that all of her kids took lessons at the local pool starting when we were about 5. My brother and sister became life guards but I didn't like it that much. I'm not a strong swimmer but not afraid of water. I have thanked my mom many times for forcing me to learn to swim because I think it's something everyone should know how. My dad and his parent's couldn't swim and were terrified of anything over a few inches deep. I think my mom's dad was part seal. He'd go skinny dipping while there was still ice on the lakes in Minnesota where he grew up.

 

Not all that funny but my big swimming story is from Cuba a few years ago. The wife, 2 kids and I went on a snorkeling tour. The wife is totally obsessed with snorkeling and looking at fish. She's sun burnt her rear a couple times because of floating face down for hours. It was windy and my kids aren't good swimmers and the youngest was 8 years old. To start off getting away from the beach we had to go over some shallow, smooth, round coral. The waves picked me up slamming me groin first onto the coral scratching my thighs a bit. Then the wife got tired of dragging her kid because he was interfering with her seeing the fish. So I got to tow both of them. The oldest could swim but he's not athletic. The youngest kept losing his mask because it didn't fit right. We had to swim about a half mile in a big circle and pretty soon me and the kids were lagging way behind. The one guide was always on my butt saying, "keep up". When we were nearing the shore we were closer to the group but the youngest lost one of his flippers in about 10' of water. I'm floating there trying to figure out how I'm going to get it back when a lady swims up like a mermaid, dives down, picks it up and hands it back to me. I was so grateful. Get back to shore and the wife is all excited about all the fish she and how tired she was swimming that far. I look at her and say, "I never saw any fish and I had to tow both kids. Don't complain to me about being tired. I'm happy you liked the fish."

 

Another snorkelling story but not about swimming. Climbing onto the boat a different time I had a swimsuit malfunction. It ripped all the way up one side except the waist band. It didn't bother me much but my wife was so embarassed. On the ride back to the beach she kept making sure I was covered and had my legs closed. I saw the owner of the boat on the beach almost every day for a week after that. He started laughing every time he saw me and came over to compliment me on my new trunks and ask if the wife had gotten over her shock yet.

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7 hours ago, Dilvish the Deliverer said:

Question the 19th of March: Can you swim?  If so, when did you learn?   Any funny stories involving swimming?

Blub blub blubblubblub blub blubblub blub...................

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7 hours ago, Dilvish the Deliverer said:

Question the 19th of March: Can you swim?  If so, when did you learn?   Any funny stories involving swimming?

I can swim - and I learned when I was around 3. My family regularly went boating...so...

 

But my mom can't. So, when my Sixth grade class went on our class trip, we went to the water park. My mom was one of the chaperones, being the class mom (I feel like I'm getting the title wrong...). I've only heard this second hand from her and my classmates at the time (and a family friend). There was a trio of waterslides. One slide went into a wading pool. One went into the lazy river. One went into the deep pool. Of course, mom took the one that went into the lazy river. HOWEVER, on her splash down, her tube somehow came out from under her and she ended up floating (kind of?) in the water. She had her contacts in, so she refused to open her eyes. Of course, she couldn't immediately touch the ground (it was 3 feet deep) so she didn't notice she could stand in it. So she flails around like a turtle on its shell until a lifeguard comes in and saves her from DROWNING. So, that's the story of how my mom almost drowned in a pool she could stand in. 

 

We all find it funny...there were lifeguards all around, and I'm sure that it was unlikely to go too bad...but...

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Additionally, many years ago, my now 20 year old sister saved my 17 year old cousin from drowning...

She was 4 or 5 at the time. We were playing outside - me off to the side, being 8 or 9 and not wanting to play their games. Our cousin - 2 or 3 at the time - fell into the pool near the steps. He hadn't learned to swim yet (my dad's an eager beaver when it comes to teaching kids to swim...) so he began to sink the bottom. Since our grandmother was doing something in her garage (maybe with me?) we weren't there right away. My sister jumps in and we hear the splash this time. We come running to find her dragging him out of the pool...thankfully, neither of them were seriously hurt. But we were no longer allowed to play on that side of the yard (the part with the grass) again until we could ALL swim and also had adult supervision.

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9 hours ago, Dilvish the Deliverer said:

Question the 19th of March: Can you swim?  If so, when did you learn?   Any funny stories involving swimming?

 

 Funny story:

 

    I'd been in swimming pools since I was a baby, at first strapped into some sort of flotation device, then as a toddler with swim-things on my arms. Always supervised.

 

 When I was four years old, I fell in a pool when nobody was watching. My first swimming lesson. I learned to swim real damn quick.

 

Half an hour later, when somebody finally thought to go see where I'd wandered off to, they found me swimming underwater in the deep end like fish.

 

 

  When I was around twelve or thirteen, a buddy and I were in an inflatable raft at the beach. We'd paddled out into Long Island Sound about a quarter mile and were just hanging out. I don't know if the ocean and the sunshine just rocked us to sleep or if we simply lost track of time, but next thing we knew we were out in the Race and getting pulled further out by the current. So one of us paddled in the front with the one oar we had, and the other got in the water at the back and kicked. It took us over two and a half hours to get back to land.

 

 

 Later on, in my very early twenties, there were a handful of times I actually swam to Fishers Island, NY from Groton, CT...   So, yeah, I'd consider myself a strong swimmer...  ::D:

 

 

6 hours ago, redambrosia said:

That sounds creepy. What if a kraken got you :wacko:

 

 If the Kraken had gotten him, he most likely wouldn't have made it up the ladder out of the sub to go swimming in the first place...  ::D:

 

 

Edited by Mad Jack
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8 hours ago, Dilvish the Deliverer said:

Question the 19th of March: Can you swim?  If so, when did you learn?   Any funny stories involving swimming?

My mother tells me I was swimming underwater from my very first lesson, as if the idea that coming up for air was an afterthought. I never had much discipline, though, so I'm sure my form is terrible. Asthma prevents me from swimming more than about 50 feet without taking a breath these days.

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I can't remember a time when I couldn't swim. I enjoyed swimming when I was little, and was always ready for a dip.

I was dismayed to find that my little sister couldn't swim, and had to actually learn how; at age five, I found this barely conceivable. Can't SWIM? Jeez, how do you not know how to SWIM? You might as well not know how to WAL...

Um.

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7 hours ago, Evilhalfling said:

[...]

hanging out on a beach, a cute local girl talked me into jumping off a cliff. 

She dove first and it seemed easy enough. 

[...]

The dive was easy and fun.   Then I had to swim back to the shore.  It seemed to take forever and I was completely exhausted by it. I remember just letting  the waves carry me in the last stretch and smashing me into the beach.  The girl was long gone. 

Long gone because:

—she got bored waiting for you?

—she got scared you’d been washed out to sea?

—she got washed out to sea?

 

 

You could’ve written for Paul Harvey back in the day...

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9 hours ago, Dilvish the Deliverer said:

Question the 19th of March: Can you swim?  If so, when did you learn?   Any funny stories involving swimming?

Yes, but I get tired quickly when swimming, much more so than any other activity.  When I was six we moved to a house that was in the country on the banks of the Sandusky River, which is where I swam mostly, sometimes in Lake Erie.  Looking back, it's a small wonder I didn't develop some kind of mutation.  Funny stories, not really.

6 hours ago, redambrosia said:

That sounds creepy. What if a kraken got you :wacko:

I think Kraken rum already got him.

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1 hour ago, TGP said:

Long gone because:

—she got bored waiting for you?

—she got scared you’d been washed out to sea?

—she got washed out to sea?

 

 

You could’ve written for Paul Harvey back in the day...

I am not sure, I had an vague memory that she went back to dive off the cliff again.  (I think I asked around and got a vague reply) 

charitably  reason two 

uncharitably reason one. 

she said she had jumped off the cliff before, and as a local likely was a better ocean swimmer than I was. 

 

Edited by Evilhalfling
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12 hours ago, Dilvish the Deliverer said:

Question the 19th of March: Can you swim?  If so, when did you learn?   Any funny stories involving swimming?

 

Yes.  Young enough that I can't remember.  None come to mind.

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12 hours ago, Dilvish the Deliverer said:

Question the 19th of March: Can you swim?  If so, when did you learn?   Any funny stories involving swimming?

 

Yes.  My father was in the NAVY and we were around a small amount of water all the time (y'know, a couple Oceans).  We learned to swim early.  I think around 5 for me, about the same age for my brother.  I am a heck of an endurance swimmer, and I do not panic.  My brother is a faster swimmer, but has less endurance than I do. 

 

When I was in Minnesota, we had a swim class.  The point of the class one day was to endure swimming as long as we could.  Myself and one other student made it to the end of the hour by alternating between active swimming, as required, and restive swimming (floating on our backs).  The rest of the class went entirely for active swimming and burnt out about halfway.  By the end of the class they were sitting with their jaws on the floor that myself and the other kid, who were not the most fit kids, beat every single more fit kid in the endurance category twofold.  It was so nice that not one of the very large football players (and this was a 6A school) said a word, they were actually kind to us the rest of that year.  It was such an odd thing to been through.  Then again, that part of Minnesota was truly the best place ever. 

 

Little Story off topic for the day:



When I went to that school (Park High School in Cottage Grove, if you must know), I went for one year, 10th grade year.  I was in Chemistry, with three teachers and a bunch of kids older than me.  I also weightlifted, but not competitively.  The coaches actually approached me and said that the other kids were happy to have me there trying, even though I was not at their level, because the effort was being made and it showed determination and made them want to do better.  The whole school was just beyond kind.  There wasn't bullying or anything that I had experienced elsewhere, except ONE event.  And ONE friend who felt it.  I opened doors because I wanted to try.  I wasn't the best, but I made friends because I tried.  The teachers cared and actually pushed you to your potential.  Then we were torn from that place, because of my father losing his job.  Ended up back in Nessus.

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