Mad Jack

Nice - the lady with the beer stein has been on my want list for quite a while.

Noooooo, dammit... April Fool's Day isn't until Saturday. Why Is There Snow On The Ground??? 🤬

Not sure if it counts as collectible, but it's rare... Due to a certain, um, "financial dispute", I have all six fragments of the Kneecap of Vecna...

Wait... which one was Botlo, again? He was one of the bounty hunters, right?

I just put up new blinds in my father's girlfriend's bathroom - not nearly that easy. Oy...

I'm good with that...

Cognitive Recalibration.

I always like to jokingly tell people if I had a perfect dream job, it would be making a ton of money to go around whacking stupid people upside the head with a plank... It wouldn't permanently hurt them, though - they'd do or say something stupid, and then I'd "POP!" in, whack them upside the head with the plank, and "POP!" out again... And a few seconds later, they'd get up, shake their head, and say, "Gee, I guess that was really stupid. I should stop doing that..."...

There's a thread over on ENWorld asking for names for alcohol and fantasy drinks to use in D&D... Although I've only made mead a couple times in my life so far, this is the label I put on each bottle...

See, I used to spend all day at the cart using the plastic rake to skillfully fish out the popcorn-flavored ones and munch on them when my 25-yr-old self wasn't flirting with the middle-aged ladies in the Disney store across from our cart.... So when I found out you could order 5lb. bags of individual flavors, I jumped on it - they lasted me almost a month.

One of the best job perks I ever had was when I was the assistant manager of the Sweet 'N' Nutty candy cart at the local mall - once a week I'd put in the order for more candy, and I got to order stuff for myself as long as I put in the money for it. I once ordered FIVE POUNDS OF POPCORN-FLAVORED JELLY BELLY JELLY BEANS...

At one point, I also briefly had hold of a catalogue of stuff like that, cheezy little widgets companies could order for bubblegum machines... It was like the paper version of those Chinese websites that won't let you buy less than 10,000 of whatever it is you're looking at.

What, you don't have one of those really long pipe snakes with the retractable grabber thingies on the end? Back in the late '80's, when I first started to get into painting, there was a bubblegum machine at one of the local supermarkets that, for 50 cents, would spit out a plastic bubble containing one of seven different small sprues of 4 or 5 random really-damn-close-to-N-scale modern figures, which were fairly well-detailed for their size... They lasted about five months in that one machine, and I have never seen them again in my entire life nor been able to find any information on them... I spent about five dollars on trying to get a complete set, which was a fair amount of money for me at the time, but I didn't do anything with them at the time, and they soon got lost, or "cleaned up"/thrown out, or the house ate them, cuz it does that.

It's both of them. Welcome to the Great Major Appliance Conspiracy. Also, your radio is talking to you... (Don't listen!) What? You didn't see the microscopically small Ral Partha 02-958 frog familiar being used as a scall reference in those pics?

Are you sure?... <he says, getting out the holy water and stakes just in case>