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cutebutpsycho

Holiday Weekend Weddings

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Usually I don't like to use this as a space to share the ins and outs of my personal life, but I need some opinions from people who aren't QUITE as close to me.

 

Is it horribly inconsiderate to schedule one's wedding over a holiday weekend?

 

Here's the background. I'm 33, getting married for the first time. I'm trying to convince some friends of mine from out of country to come to my wedding and trying to sweeten the pot with Reapercon, so I want it to be near Reapercon. I want to be able to go to Reapercon and celebrate with my Reaper friends rather than asking them to travel across the country and get a hotel where I live. I'm waiting for one of my best friends to return from a deployment. I have 3 of my 4 wedding party members traveling from out of state (thus needing an extra travel day if possible). I have the majority of my family (and my fiancee's family) out of state. The wedding is slated to be out of doors, so we need weather that will be neither too hot (for my fiancee) or too cold (for me) in Minnesota. My fiancee works odd shifts, so we need to make sure he has the days necessary off (because he'll just have burned all of his vacation time on a trip to Europe/Egypt). All of this combines into a perfect storm saying "MEMORIAL DAY WEEKEND". And, of course, now I have people telling me how inconsiderate I am for choosing that weekend. I HONESTLY have no problem with people having plans already and being unable to go, but I feel I need to consider the schedules of the wedding party and my groom before I consider the schedules of my potential attendees. Am I out of line?

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I think you are being very considerate, trying to get a weekend when most folks have off and giving them time to travel. I say go with your plan for memorial day and enjoy:)

Congratulations also!

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I could say you were being an inconsiderate so and so if you tried to hold a wedding during Christmas, Thanksgiving, Easter, or a traditional holiday where people travel like hell and wanna be with their families.

 

Memorial Day weekend isn't really one of those, is it? I mean, I don't know anyone who plans to spend Memorial Day with the grandparents, or generally holds family reunions around then. I never do.

 

Then again, you're having a wedding. Weddings are one of those things where, basically, unless you do the whole thing at MY convenience, you're being a Bridezilla. That is to say, if I don't say that, I'm certain someone will. Assuming your family and circle of friends is big enough, that is. I've never seen a wedding where SOMEONE didn't kick up a fuss and try to have everything arranged to their personal convenience, and t'hell with everyone else. You've got to be ready to put your foot down after you've been reasonable enough.

 

That being said, you REALLY should consider the groom's needs. I mean, he's just a MAN, of course, but they do like to clutch at the illusion that they're in control of something. =)

 

Alternatively, you could just hold a regular wedding and, later, a geek ceremony in Denton. I'll do my fire dance, if you want! (and if Ed will let me anywhere near the building while doing so...)

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I went for Valentine's Day, myself. I knew if I didn't pick a big day, I'd be in trouble once a year for forgetting it...

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It doesn't seem inconsiderate to me at all. If it's good for you, your groom and the wedding party, go for it! If I was a member of your wedding party, I'd appreciate you planning it over Memorial Weekend - it would save me from having to use a vacation day.

 

As some have stated above, Christmas and Thanksgiving would be the big no-no's. I do know someone who got married on Christmas Eve. I don't know anyone who actually went to their wedding.

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The people who are complaining suck. You can't make everyone happy all the time; you are already doing what you can to meet your needs, and those of as many of your guests as possible. I'd happily scratch those people off the guest list if they are going to piss and moan about the dates.

 

~v

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Go right on ahead and have your wedding when it best suits your husband and wedding party. Steve and I got married on Labor Day weekend for that same reason. My other sister got married on Mothers' Day, and my oldest got married on Leap Day (they're still technically newlyweds after 20 years)

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Well the heck with it. I've booked a venue for Memorial Day Sunday. Those who consider my wedding a priority will be there-those that don't won't. It's that simple. Yes, I realize some people have unavoidable obligations but that's going to happen ANY day I'd choose-so I go with the one that works best for those who are most important. Me and my fiancee first-our wedding party second-our families third. Anyone else who can make it is gravy-those who can't...well, they'll be missed.

 

And as for the Reaper types....we do plan on celebrating with our gaming friends down in Denton over the weekend of Reapercon. We figure if Reaper is considerate enough to fly all their painters and sculptors in for the weekend prior to our wedding, who are we to not take advantage of it? ;)

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First, congrats on your impending nuptials!

 

Second, I agree with those who posted above. Memorial day is fine, especially if people have to travel; it give them more time. So long as it is not a religious holiday, you should be good.

 

Good luck!

 

Andy

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I got married May 28, so it falls on Memorial Day at times.

My brother-in-law got married on Dec 26th. Now that was a pain in the butt. Nobody was happy driving on Christmas.

So go for it!

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Both you and Matt have come out hellaciously lucky. I look forward to congratulating you both in person at ReaperCon, and presenting the wedding gift. I also look forward to picking it out... (my first thought was "Hey, the Hello Kitty Toaster!" but that's much, much too ordinary for YOU two...)

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