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And in response to question and suggestion: the fighter's final words to his opponent went something like this:

"...AND IF I DIE... I DIE WITH MY {teacup} JAMMED UP YOUR [Thermal Exhaust Port, beam shielded, but a proton torpedo could set off the reaction]"

It was inelegantly put, true, but he said it with such feeling.

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This story reminded me of another evil thing I did a while back...

The players have walked into a trap.

GM: "The doors slam shut on either end of the room."

Rogue: "I spring forward, and try to stop the door--"

GM: "The door snapped shut before you even move. As you spring forward, you hear a "ka-KLUNK" of some sort of large, heavy bolt falling into place. You reach the door, and that sucka ain't movin'. At ALL. You might as well be trying to open a brick wall."

Fighter: "Can I try the other door?"

GM: As you approach it, you hear and feel a "TUNKA-THUNK" through the soles of your shoes. Puffs of dust appear in all four corners of the room, spraying from the seams in the corners that you didn't notice until now..."

Rogue: "I have a bad feeling about this."

Fighter, mage, sorcerer and cleric all groan and throw things at Rogue.

Fighter: "Can I get the door to move? 18 strength. Do I need to roll?"

GM: "You can roll." (player rolls a 12) "There is nearly no give to the door, and when you try to push it the way it came, you can feel it move SLIGHTLY, but something is BLOCKING it; probably a bolt or stop of some kind."

Rogue: "Can I disarm it?"

GM: "Sure, if you can somehow phase through the stone wall. It's between you and the door mechanisms, and you can't see any access points. Oh, and somewhere nearby, you feel and hear a grinding sound... grinding... and then it begins to gather speed, and grows quieter... and then you hear a clunking mechanical sound, like enormous gears and shafts... DOOOM-jah! There is a pause... DOOM-jah! A shorter pause... DOOM-jah! And then, you hear it every few seconds, regularly... DOOM-jah! DOOM-jah! DOOM-jah!"

Fighter: "I look around. Is anything happening to the room?"

GM: "The left and right walls, the ones without doors, are starting to move towards you."

Mage: "Would a Knock spell do anything? I try it on the door."

GM: "Normally, it'd work fine, but the problem is that something has literally FALLEN INTO PLACE behind each door, preventing it from opening. They aren't LOCKED, they're BLOCKED, and a Knock spell won't affect a twenty pound stone block jammed into a notch behind the door. DOOM-jah! DOOM-jah!"

Cleric: "I stick my ten foot pole in such a way as to keep the walls from closing."

GM: "You barely have time to get the pole horizontal before it jams between the walls. DOOM-jah! DOOM-jah! DOOM-jah! It slows the walls down not at all, as it bends, bows and snaps. DOOM-jah! DOOM-jah! DOOM-jah!"

Sorceror: "What are the walls made of?"

GM: "Each is a single slab of stone. Can't tell how thick it is. DOOM-jah! DOOM-jah! DOOM-jah! "

Rogue: "I start hammering spikes into the cracks in the corners to slow it down."

GM: "Gaps are too small. Can't get the edges in. DOOM-jah!"

(The players begin to discuss options. GM lets them. After five minutes or so,) GM: "DOOM-jah! DOOM-jah! DOOM-jah!"

Mage: "God, I wish he'd quit doing that."

Fighter, in a fit of rage: "I HIT THE WALL AS HARD  AS I CAN WITH MY WARHAMMER!"

GM: "Roll to hit. Anything but a one, to see if you fumble. DOOM-jah! DOOM-jah! DOOM-jah!" (Dice are rolled. The player does not fumble. A damage total is calculated, and is actually pretty impressive)

GM: "Okay, you hit the wall, and you hit it HARD, enough to chip a hunk of rock out as big as your hand! DOOM-jah! DOOM-junka-junka-junka-KANK! Dunka, dunka, dunka, DOOM-kank! DOOM-kank! DOOM-BADANG! RUMBLE, RUMBLE, RUMBLE, RUMBLE, RUMBLE, RUMBLE, rumble, rumble, rumble. rumble..... long pause... distant KADUNK! And there is silence."


Cleric: "Are the walls still moving?"

GM: No. They stopped about the time the noises got weird."

Fighter: "What happened?"

Rogue: "Dude, I think you broke it."

Later, upon being asked, I said something to the effect of, "Well, guys, the tomb of Azenak WAS built over three thousand years ago, using neolithic technology. Did you really expect EVERYTHING to keep working perfectly?"

Edited by Dr.Bedlam
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Awesome DM work Bedlam. reminds me of something I read a while back. A Dm had his lower level party in an encounter involving some sort of shaman. He described for the party how the shaman pointed his dagger at the party fighter. chanted some stuff, and made a couple of slashing motions while lances oflight shot out. No save, no nothing. Dagger damage only though, you know 1d4+1 or so. The party players all had a fit. What kind of spell did that and complaint on auto damage yadda yadda. Only two people at the table got it. the DM and the party wizard. While everyone was complaining the wizard looked at the DM and asked "magic missile" ? Dm made it colourful and creative and interesting and the poor players, who I guess were more used to 'roll' playing than roleplaying were never expecting it.


Point is, a few well chossen details, actions, and decriptions can change the game into something much cooler

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