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Dr.Bedlam

Things I Hate About Christmas

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I like Christmas shopping, but not when The Hordes are out there with me... crowds, no.

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I start Christmas shopping in January... I try and avoid the physical shops (except the supermarket & fruit shop) from the start of December... thats when things start getting nuts with everyone who forgot to pick up their presents earlier...

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I love Amazon shopping. They deliver 7 days a week.  Won't go near shopping areas if it can be avoided. Absolutely not going near the mall.  They block off all but one entrance and exit, and put up a bunch of barriers so there is only one designated one-way path through the parking lots. 

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I love Amazon shopping. They deliver 7 days a week.  Won't go near shopping areas if it can be avoided. Absolutely not going near the mall.  They block off all but one entrance and exit, and put up a bunch of barriers so there is only one designated one-way path through the parking lots.

 

:blink:

 

And the fire codes allow it?

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I love Amazon shopping. They deliver 7 days a week.  Won't go near shopping areas if it can be avoided. Absolutely not going near the mall.  They block off all but one entrance and exit, and put up a bunch of barriers so there is only one designated one-way path through the parking lots.

:blink:

 

And the fire codes allow it?

 

not where I'm from they wouldn't. The fire marshal would have a conniption 

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What is an "elf on the shelf"?

It is an elf doll. It goes with a story about elf dolls that come to life and rat the child out to Santa. you know to get kids used to the idea that they are being spied on by an inscrutable and distant power, through agents of questionable effectiveness.

 

Also to try and scare your kid into being good for a month or so before Christmas. It is somewhat deplorable. 

 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Elf_on_the_Shelf

Edited by Werkrobotwerk
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I love Amazon shopping. They deliver 7 days a week.  Won't go near shopping areas if it can be avoided. Absolutely not going near the mall.  They block off all but one entrance and exit, and put up a bunch of barriers so there is only one designated one-way path through the parking lots.

:blink:

 

And the fire codes allow it?

 

not where I'm from they wouldn't. The fire marshal would have a conniption 

 

 

It might be just the parking lot entrances & exits.  More places are starting to have strict traffic flow during peak traffic times so that things keep moving. 

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Christmas is a celebration of lights and winter in many ways, and it always feels like it should be the end, but Winter is just getting started (started here in early November).  I always feel very let down when i realize I have 3 to 4 more months of cold to endure after the holiday.

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I drank 20 beers 

That is a lot of beer. You would save some serious time by increasing the alcohol content of your drinks...

 

 

I have a good related story.

 

You see- my dad was in a garage band as a teenager back in the nineteen-somethings and they recently got together after finishing their professional careers in various fields for a reunion of sorts. Turns out, he was pretty much the only one who wanted to play music, the others just wanted to hang out, drink, and tell stories.

 

All the other guys had become serious drinkers in their retirement, and they drank the lowest alcohol content crap you could find. They reasoned that if you wanted to be drinking all day, the only way to do it without killing yourself is to just stay buzzed all day by continuously drinking natty light or worse. These guys were pros. They barely ate any food, they all just drank all day and night. One of them would have something like 8 by the time my dad was finishing breakfast.

 

So, I guess the point is, maybe he's not trying to save time, maybe he's going pro.

 

OT: I like Christmas.

Edited by pinkymadigan
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"Elf on a shelf" should be something in an orc's pantry...right next to Dwarf-Tarts and Manflesh-Helper

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I love Amazon shopping. They deliver 7 days a week.  Won't go near shopping areas if it can be avoided. Absolutely not going near the mall.  They block off all but one entrance and exit, and put up a bunch of barriers so there is only one designated one-way path through the parking lots.

:blink:

 

And the fire codes allow it?

 

not where I'm from they wouldn't. The fire marshal would have a conniption 

 

 

It might be just the parking lot entrances & exits.  More places are starting to have strict traffic flow during peak traffic times so that things keep moving. 

 

 

Yes, it's only the parking lot, not the stores themselves.  Except "flow" is not the word I'd use.  Traffic backs up onto the highway because there is only one entrance.  Once inside the 'loop' all traffic is routed on an inner perimeter right next to every store entrance, which means cars are often at a standstill due to shoppers going in and out of stores. So you can't get out of your parking space, because the two cars behind you can't move, because the cars on the 'road' can't move because a bunch of people are in the way. And everyone is funneled down the same route instead of being allowed to escape the madness through the normal exits. 

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Perhaps it IS a Colorado thing.

 

They have Bumbles at Lowe's, for potato's sake.

 

Things are looking up! (...or at least blown up).  I spotted two, identical(1), inflatable, twenty five foot(2) tall inflated(3)  Santas today. They were each standing on the roof of a car dealership showroom,  glaring at each other from opposite sides of a freeway.

 

 

1) they had the exact same inflated, upcurled, handlebar moustaches...  ::P: 

2) that'd be 7600mm 'scale' for you wargamer types...  <_< 

3) as opposed to deflated.  

Edited by TGP
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It was something of a fad a year or two back. It's kinda a fun game for the kids though. 

 

A fun game for the kids was a two dollar elf decoration you sat in the living room and pretended was real.

 

A manufactured tradition designed as a sales point to separate suckers from their money is a $30 elf decoration that you can buy clothing and accessories for.

 

I'd just as soon spend the money and buy the kid a Barbie doll. It's cheaper.

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