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A quotation a day...


Weezoh
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Steve Page is going to throttle me for being the first to quote from his new book..but .. poo on him! :)

 

"GOLD BRICKS

 

Teach us Your secret, Master! yap my Yahoos.

Then for the hardness of their hearts, and for the

 softness of their heads, I taught them Magick.

But...alas!

Thech us Your real secret, Master! how to become

 invisible, how to acquire love, and oh! beyond all,

 how to make gold.

But how much gold will you give me for the Secret

 of Infinite Riches?

Then said the foremost and most foolish; Master, it

 is nothing; but here is an hundred thousand

 pounds.

This did I design to accept, and whispered in his ear

 this secret:

A SUCKER IS BORN EVERY MINUTE. "

 

from The Book Of Lies, by Aleister Crowley

 

Not sure if the book came from the Philosophy or the Occult department at our local Borders bookstore, but it has to be just about some of the weirdest stuff I ever read.

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"Antiquis temporibus, nati tibi similes in rupibus ventosissimis exponebantur ad necem."

- (In the good old days, children like you were left to perish on windswept crags.)

 

"Mater tua criceta fuit, et pater tuo redoluit bacarum sambucus"

- (Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries)

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Actually, an oxymoron is more along the lines of a moron with an OH+ radical attached. Since both morons and free radicals tend to bind strongly to the first interesting thing that comes along, this is a match made in heaven.

-- The Internet Oracle

 

 

I must admit that Micro$oft does seem to bear an awful resemblence to the Sirius Cybernetic Corporation, considering that my attempts at using Word always resulted in something almost, but not quite, entirely unlike a document.

-- Rich Kaszeta

 

I think it's a beautiful day to go to the zoo and feed the ducks...to the lions.

-- Brian Kantor

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Homer: Ahh, not a bear in sight. The bear patrol must be working like a charm.

Lisa: That's spacious reasoning dad.

Homer: Thank you honey.

Lisa: By you're logic, i can claim that this rock keeps tigers away.

Homer: Hmm..how does it work?

Lisa: It doesn't work.

Homer: Uh huh.

Lisa: Its just a stupid rock!

Homer: Uh huh.

Lisa: But you don't see any tigers around here, do you?

Homer: (looks around, thinks) Lisa, I wanna buy your rock.

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