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Has this ever happened to you? What did you do?


Daewen98
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 Yeah, those cat riders are the ones I mentioned - what you have in that pic there is pieces of both sets... There's a set of two archers, which has two of the same figure, but two different cats (a tiger and a sabertooth), and there's a set of spear carriers with two different figures and two different sabertooth cats.

An Italian company named Mirliton has the current license for most of the old Grenadier figures, and each set will run you about $13, but the shipping from Italy is a bit steep.

 

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Luckily my mom never tried such a thing with me. I've been fortunate to live with people who respect other's property to not touch it.

 

Except my kids, who have zero concept, yet. As I am cleaning/purging the house this year, they will be warned that unless they help in order to protect things important to them, stuff is getting tossed. I can't take time to try and read their minds.

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Me, no.

 

Grump, yes.

 

Books donated by his mum.

 

And he had a lot of painted miniatures stolen, and bought them back at a yard sale for something like a tenner.

 

The person that had stolen them was in jail, and Grump figured that the guy getting out and learning that his mum had sold them for ten bucks would be amusing revenge.

 

 

Good luck recovering what you can.

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42 minutes ago, Daewen98 said:

Thanks, I'm hoping to as well, doing a check list to see how much it would cost to replace it all if it comes to it. Not looking so good right now :blink:

 

 Eh, space it out over time and it's not too bad. Like we said, most of them are still in production, so you can save up for them a bit at a time.

 

 

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3 hours ago, Daewen98 said:

Hey everyone,


Just last night, I came home from work and started looking for my pewter miniatures that I have been slowly gathering over the past year or so, gone! All my pewter figurines were given away by my Mom who thought they were items to be donated, when infact I had them all set to take to a friends house to be painted once I got the call from my friends to come over.

 

A total of at least 10-11 miniatures, almost all that I found on eBay auctions and won. Couple of them were early 90s and the rest of them were more recent. I was extremely proud of my finds since some of them were hard to find, rare or a real fight to win in auction. All the items were unpainted and in mint condition thanks to the sellers taking great care. All of the miniatures were waiting to painted or in the process of being prepared to be painted or actually in the beginning of it.

What was given away

 

  • Three full sets of paintbrushes (Cheaper ones but still really nice, two of which still unused)
  • Bombshell Mini 32mm Fa'o - Cat Huntress (Just started painting her)
  • Dark Sword DSM-7622 Stephanie Law Masterworks Muse Polyhymnia Mythic Female (Was looking for a professional to work on her, she was too pretty for me, a beginner, to attempt)
  • Grenadier 3x Female Warriors Sabertooth Great Cat Riders (Could not paint yet, they were early 80s (I think) and lead.)
  • Lance & Laser 25mm 28mm Dungeons & Dragons Anthropomorphic Cat Ranger Archer (Unpainted)
  • Reaper Gwyneth Roanmane 1998 (Primed but unpainted)
  • Reaper Raindancer Pegasus (Mint condition, wings needed to be attached and primed)
  • A custom Tibbit character from HeroForge (just realized I had it with the others)
  • A gryphon (plastic, trimmed of flash and prepped for painting)

 

Another thing that I realized that was in the bag, a custom necklace I made for. A lovely hematite necklace with amethyst and a wolfhead pendant.

 

Has this ever happened to you? What did you do? Can anyone help me?

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Inform the parent unit that they have made a large Error In Judgment.

Do this in a calm and polite fashion.

Ask parental unit what they intend to do to rectify the situation.

Present copies of electronic receipts for all items won on ebay, and the above reference picture for the jewelry.

Have a serious [as in adult level of conversation/attitude on the part of all parties] discussion with parental unit about the whole situation, including the reverse scenario where "someone" would hypothetically go through parental units things and just randomly start tossing stuff out/giving things away, and how parental unit would feel/respond.

 

Since you said the problem was discovered when you came home from a job I'm assuming that all of the "given away" items were purchased with money you had earned.  That being the case, it's time [and past time] to have a serious discussion of where proper boundaries are in your household and to obtain a clear understanding that Your Personal Property is Off Limits without prior authorization.

GEM

And inform your parental unit that this advice is being given to you from somebody old enough to be their parental unit.

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3 hours ago, Daewen98 said:

We're in the process now of doing just that but sadly, I was told that there is little to no chance of getting them back since the donation place already sorted and sent them off to thrift stores. My hope is sadly fading. ::(:

If the donation center is keeping proper records then they know to what thrift stores items were sent/shipped during the time-frame of interest.  They can provide those records.  They should have a manifest record of what was sent, by classification if not the actual items.  If they don't have that information then they are in violation of a whole laundry list of laws and regulations.

If they won't provide you the information on which stores they shipped to voluntarily then suggest that they could [note the exact word used] be compelled to provide that information should a police report be filed.  For Insurance Purposes you may need to file a Police Report, even though there is no "crime" here in the statutory sense. 

Be polite but businesslike in your discussions, and don't talk to the regular workers about this, insist on talking to supervisory level personnel and make sure to write down the name and title of the supervisory personnel you discuss this with.  Don't be adversarial and if the people you are talking with start to become agitated or adversarial work to calm them down and ask they to put themselves in your place.  Emphasis on the fact that you are willing to pay them for the property, you are just trying to mitigate the time and effort involved in replacing everything.

Good Luck, and I ope that you find people to deal with who are empathetic and willing to help.

GEM

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1 hour ago, PaganMegan said:

Me, no.

 

Grump, yes.

 

Books donated by his mum.

 

And he had a lot of painted miniatures stolen, and bought them back at a yard sale for something like a tenner.

 

The person that had stolen them was in jail, and Grump figured that the guy getting out and learning that his mum had sold them for ten bucks would be amusing revenge.

 

 

Good luck recovering what you can.

Beat me to it.

 

The worst part on the books was how much one of them would have cost to replace, even at the time. (Out of print translation of a Danish(?) children's story. When I was looking for it in the nineties, I couldn't find a copy - but I did find someone willing to pay $1,500 for a copy....)

 

The minis... I was pretty sure even at the time as to who had stolen them, and his mom's yard sale meant getting them back with less hassle. (She offered to give them back to me, but I told her that I would like it better if she told him how much she sold it for instead. I charge more per figure to paint than she charged for the entire case. For that matter, the case had cost me more....)

 

Given that the figures are mostly still available, I am hoping that you get your amulet back, that would be harder to replace, if it can be replaced at all.

 

The Auld Grump

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My mother once upon a time sold some of my books. Not gave them away, sold them. She had bought some of them and given them to me as Christmas/Birthday presents, and saw no problem in selling them again because of that. Of course she didn't ask my permission first or gave me the money she made.

 

3 hours ago, Green Eyed Monster said:

Have a serious [as in adult level of conversation/attitude on the part of all parties] discussion with parental unit about the whole situation, including the reverse scenario where "someone" would hypothetically go through parental units things and just randomly start tossing stuff out/giving things away, and how parental unit would feel/respond.

 

Problem is, not all parents are willing to have adult conversations with their teenage/young adult children. Yes, I get that a lot of the children might get too emotional, but a discussion like this in my family would go "well, respect your elders, I thought you were too messy, my house my rules, we have done so much for you, if you don't like it, leave". I even got that "respect your elders" thing when I politely asked my aunt to stop calling me fat after I had already moved out. And that's the half of the family I get along with better.

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My stepfather once decided to help me by "cleaning out" my car. Which meant throwing out everything he found inside of it. I didn't find out until the next day, after trash pickup. I had almost all the run of Mordheim Town Cryers in it at the time....which are now about 25 bucks an issue when they can be found at all. 

Over the years, I made it very clear that when the time came it would be me choosing what nursing home he wound up in. I'd also bring up various articles concerning abuses in the elder care industry....my stuff got left alone after that.

I also headed off any criticism of my hobby buying by straight out asking if he'd prefer I take up gambling or drugs instead. Bringing up the idea of tangible items with potential resale value at higher prices in 20 years time tends to settle down parental units when they realize it can be consitered investment.

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5 hours ago, Green Eyed Monster said:

Inform the parent unit that they have made a large Error In Judgment.

Do this in a calm and polite fashion.

Ask parental unit what they intend to do to rectify the situation.

Present copies of electronic receipts for all items won on ebay, and the above reference picture for the jewelry.

Have a serious [as in adult level of conversation/attitude on the part of all parties] discussion with parental unit about the whole situation, including the reverse scenario where "someone" would hypothetically go through parental units things and just randomly start tossing stuff out/giving things away, and how parental unit would feel/respond.

 

Since you said the problem was discovered when you came home from a job I'm assuming that all of the "given away" items were purchased with money you had earned.  That being the case, it's time [and past time] to have a serious discussion of where proper boundaries are in your household and to obtain a clear understanding that Your Personal Property is Off Limits without prior authorization.

GEM

And inform your parental unit that this advice is being given to you from somebody old enough to be their parental unit.


The Monster's feelings echo my own.

I had a similar situation when I left home for college. Left to begin the summer sessions... came home at the end of the summer for a few weeks before the fall semester... and "What did you do with all my STUFF?"

"Oh, you didn't take it with you, so we thought you didn't want it."

I explained with some heat that I could not possibly jam everything I owned in a 1974 Chevy Impala and half a dorm room, and how would YOU feel if I randomly discarded YOUR possessions, on the assumption that you didn't want them? Particularly when converting the only home I had into a sewing room and musical instrument storage with a folding rolly bunk jammed into the corner like an afterthought?

Eventually, a state of equilibrium was reached, but it was a pretty serious breach of trust on my part; most of my old Grenadier minis were gone, most of my original Traveller materials, and a variety of other items to make geeks weep. That, and the rolly bunk, unlike my lost bed, was narrower than my shoulders.

Still burns my biscuits, 36 years later.

And this is NOT a thing one does when one respects the property of others; this is a thing one does when one thinks "well, I have no interest in these items, therefore they are crap, therefore, I will act accordingly." Or, to paraphrase George Carlin, my stuff is my stuff, but your stuff is crap.

Grrr.

I wish I could offer useful advice that others have not yet offered. 

I am, however, curious: Of all the people to whom this has HAPPENED... has there ever been a parental figure or guilty party who said something akin to "Oh, wow. I made a terrible mistake, and I must therefore stand financially responsible for discarding your property. In what way may I offer you immediate monetary compensation for my error?"

Because I've never heard of any of the guilty parties actually doing that, though I have heard several stories of this sort.

 

 

 

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I have never heard of any parental units issuing an apology, much less offering financial compensation.

 

I had one friend who had not yet come out as gay, who's mother tossed in the garbage all of his gaming books. AD&D 1st edition. It established a routine of her trying to control him and make him deny himself. He attempted suicide.

 

He finally freed himself of her yoke. Last I heard he was moving to San Francisco and marrying his husband, happily.

 

Some parents do it for control. Some by accident/cluelessness, and some, as mentioned, by assumptions based on their own opinions. Being a parent, they're always right and there is no reason to apologise for being right.

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