Identify The Critter

[Dr.Bedlam]

I need some help identifying this skull.

 Seriously, what kind of critter WAS this thing?

The skull is not real; it seems to be a resin cast, and as far as I can tell, it is not representative of anything that ever actually walked the earth. Judging from the smaller teeth, I'm guessing the master was sculpted from scratch by someone with only a tenuous grasp on what animal skulls, much less their teeth, are supposed to look like. The final puzzle piece: I got it at Hobby Lobby in the Mens Decor section; ten bucks.

I reiterate the question: If a visitor to my home steps into the trophy room with me for brandy and cigars... and sees THAT thing... and asks what it IS... 

...what should I reply? Answers need not be serious, but bonus points for cleverness.

 

[Chaoswolf]

A spotted pelt sabre-toothed were-goblin skull.

[Sylverthorne]

Dire mole. Obviously; those 'eye sockets' are actually nostrils; it's a common mistake...

[Glitterwolf]

That my friend is an early Sabrevampiredont!

[Cranky Dog]

It looks very much inspired by saber tooth tiger/smilodon skulls.

 

Though the back teeth aren't quite right to be like the real thing.

Edited August 2, 2018 by Cranky Dog

[Wyvernfire]

Saber tooth jackalope doe, which is why it's missing the antlers.

[Kheprera]

Reverse-tusked carniverous dwarf elephant.

[Green Eyed Monster]

It's a Late Mesozoic Era Fang Toothed Walamungas.

The large fangs are actually digging tools to allow it to get to the Giant Grubs and Beetles that comprise the bulk of its diet.

It's range was what is now Upper Outer Mongolia and into Siberia.  Due to the relative unexplored nature of the modern area that was its normal range specimen are rare with no complete skeletons having been unearthed.

GEM

[Clearman]

Actually, looks like my x-rays before I got braces...

[haldir]

Wahbittaurus Wex.

 

It was feared across what is now the Western side of the US.

[paintybeard]

44 minutes ago, Cranky Dog said:

It looks very much inspired by saber tooth tiger/smilodon skulls.

 

Though the back teeth aren't quite right to be like the real thing.

 

Agreed, this looks like a souped up smilodon skull:

 

[Dr.Bedlam]

Well, yeah, but the skull just above has a FACE.

So does mine, but even if it COULD close its mouth, its FACE would be on top of its HEAD!

[Mad Jack]

 

 Obviously, it's a prehistoric ancestor of the modern-day Wookalar... (You've got it upside down.)

 

 

Edited August 2, 2018 by Mad Jack

[Unruly]

It's the cookoocachew, ancestor of the modern walrus.

Edited August 2, 2018 by Unruly

[strawhat]

Saber-toothed Boa Constrictor.

 

Or a were-walrus.